"a picture is worth a thousand words" has never rung truer.

word up. so I'm sitting at work today on my computer, store's fuckin' dead as shit and I look on my facebook and there are pictures of two people (who will remain nameless) and it's all friendly and suddenly I'm hit with this overwhelming urge to throw up all the delicious naan that coco and I had just eaten. and as I'm thinking about this throughout the day, a few things come into my head:

#1. why do I care about there pictures that were posted in december?
#2. since when have photos become so indicative of relationships or powerfully emotional?
#3. why am I acting like a baby when I usually don't give a fuck?

so now I'm trying to answer those questions.

#1. I care because they tell me something about the nature of a relationship that, even though it existed many months ago and has since ended, is still something that gets to me.
#2. I guess the nature of photography has been to aid in nostalgia, to give you the ability to recall memories more vividly. they're freeze-frames of whatever you want them to see, as far as the camera can see (which is why it's hard sometimes to put emotional depth in a photograph and easy at other times). it's pretty much a snapshot of whatever is going on at the moment, the expressions made, the general feeling in the room -- so naturally they're emotional.
#3. I'm acting like a baby because I care. because those powerful emotions were hurtful ones. I guess that's a new thing because I'm used to being a lot more stoic in my emotions (less easily moved to feelings of vomit and disgust, I suppose). this is just a different side of my personality that hasn't come out in a very long time.

so maybe I'm happy to be a bit of a baby since it shows that I care? but it's totally contradictory to the person that I see myself as and understand myself to be. so I'll just hang out here in emotional limbo for a little bit. nice.

and for some good grooving, check out mc luscious, my classic 90's throwback. word up.